MIDLIFE "MOMOTOV COCKTAIL"

After the infamous Russian "Molotov Cocktail" incendiary bomb (said to actually originate from the Spanish Civil War), I've dubbed the "compleat" experience of motherhood after 40: The Midlife "Momotov" Cocktail.

Roughly speaking, the explosive ingredients of The Momotov Cocktail include:

Xtreme immersion in the demands of a child-centered universe (to infinity and beyond!), combined with encroaching menopause, a plummeting descent into Old Bagdom, memory loss, sleep deprivation, extreme multitasking (on Fast Forward), loss of peer group (who, with kids at college, are now sunning their Cesareans in the Seychelles, and sucking back on rum punch), all half-baked in the world of under-35 Stepford Moms.

(Of course, there are other types and variations, but you get the picture!)

If you are a new mom over 40, all of this can be yours—followed by a kicker of a hangover best described as Midlife Mom Burnout.

Special conditions require special remedies. Here are the current FPM survival tips for the "morning after" you become a member of the midlife mom 'hood.

Do you have Over 40 Mom survival tips to share with our FPM readers? Email Me.

If you suspect you have a health problem, please see your doctor—suggestions provided here are not a substitute for qualified medical care. Also consult your doctor and naturopath before taking any herbal remedies.

Note: With special thanks to Homeopath, Lorraine Stern, CCH, for her input on our Survival Tips. To contact Lorraine:  Website.  Email.

NATURAL "MOMOTOV MOM" SURVIVAL TIPS

#1.  Avoid Coffee and caffeine-laced beverages. Just say NO! After years of creamy cappuccinos and luxurious lattes during work breaks, this may seem an unfair deprivation.

However, caffeine overworks your already-clapped-out adrenals and you'll end up like Dr. Krunklehorn on her "caffeine patch" (screaming even without provocation) in the 2007 animated film, Meet The Robinsons.

Dr Krunklehorn on her caffeine patch

Ginseng supports the adrenals and is easy to drink as a tea. However, you should also see your doctor and naturopath on for guidance on ginseng and further adrenal support. Plenty of sleep is the best cure for adrenal burnout.

Note: Ginseng: Always read package instructions and cautions; ginseng should only be taken for short periods before taking a break; it is also considered to be an aphrodisiac. (Frank will be eternally grateful, I'm sure!)

#2. Keep Your Sleep. Insomnia gets worse as you age and small kids can have you so wound up by bedtime that you feel like an elastic band on a sling shot.

Not a fan of prescription sleep meds, I prefer herbal remedies, if they work. My all-time tried and trusted for sleep is Tension RX Nighttime—I even give it to my husband when he's going through a bout of insomnia.

(Please check with your doctor before taking any herbal remedy. The advice of a naturopath is also recommended.)

I also make my own fresh teas from the garden which I drink an hour before bed—chamomile, lavender with some honey thrown in. Chamomile teas are readily available at the supermarket or health food store.

#3.  Deep Breathe Your Way Out of It. At least 3 times a day I feel the blood rushing in my head as if my ears were conch shells about to explode—especially when Alex is shouting for help with his shoelaces and Lizzie wants "potty service", and my spine feels like a balloon animal, all at the same time.

Deep breathing using simple yoga techniques you can master in minutes helps slow heart rate, calm the nervous system, and make those muscles more relaxed. (And you can even do it standing up if you have to!)

#4.  Rescue Me Baby! I carry Rescue Remedy (Bach Flower Remedies) in my purse, car, home office—I'd carry 'em behind my ears if there was room. They are a FPM must have!

Rescue Remedy takes the edge off frazzled nerves, eases shock or anxiety, or settles your system when you're angry. It comes in liquid or lozenge forms and they make Rescue Remedy for kids too, great for anxiety or full on melt-downs.

#5.  Loosen Up, Girl!  I don't know about you, but I'm still picking up 30-50lb kids with one arm while cooking dinner with the other. And "pushing 50" feels more like 50 is pushing me. The fall-out is waking up in the morning feeling like the Tin Man after a rain storm.

Arnica is a  herbal remedy well known for treating strains, sprains and bruises. You can try a little arnica cream on the "Owies" to ease the pain.

#6.  Bathroom Meditation. When you think there's nowhere to hide, use your "potty visit" to try to "hom" in the bathroom. It may feel weird, but it's usually the one place that you can find a quiet space. It'll give you a sense of well being.

#7.  Natural Treasure Walks. Take a stroll in a local nature preserve—beach, woods, trails. Get the kids focused on hunting for interesting rocks, shells, plants, bugs (bring a bug magnifier). It will give you a chance to exercise, think and draw strength and replenishment from nature.

#8.  Salt Of The Earth:

Kali phos is a homeopathic cell salt that helps you with re-cooping your energy when you are over-tired.

Ferrum phos is a homeopathic cell salt will keep your energy up and help keep your immune system strong so you don't get sick. This is also great for the kids, especially before school starts and during cold season to strengthen their immune systems.

#9.  Madge, You're Soaking In It! Remember the 1960s and 70s TV commercials with Madge the manicurist, soaking her unsuspecting clients' fingers in Palmolive dish soap? ("Softens your hands while you do dishes!")

Well, here's a soak even Madge might like.

Get the kids to bed at night and relax in a hot tub or warm bath and let your cares float away.

To enhance your relaxation, use Epsom salts (available at most pharmacies OTC), sea salt, or several drops of lavender or chamomile oils.

#10.  The Fountain Of Youth. The real fountain of youth is water—as you get older, drink more to hydrate and cleanse your skin and internal organs. Make sure to eat plenty of fresh fruit (including berries) and vegetables (especially the dark leafy kind such as kale).

I add a slice of organic lemon and a slice of fresh ginger for digestion in my daily intake of water.

#11.  Extreme Burn-Out. Over-the-top tiredness, especially combined with depression, can indicate a low thyroid. If you feel this way, go to your doctor and have your thyroid checked.

You can also get help with algae and kelp! Most Kelp has iodine, and that's what stimulates the thyroid. Eating sushi rolls are a great way to get kelp. The Japanese markets have kelp candies that taste quite good too. They are also available in pill form—be careful to read the instructions and cautions on the label, and consult your doctor and naturopath.

#12.  Time Out Mom! In your 20's and 30's—and before children—you were the Mistress of Multi-Task, The Queen of Qi. Now, running after babies and toddlers in your 40-something body, too often your schedule is writing checks your body can't cash.

Check your guilt in at the door, and get a caregiver you trust a minimum of twice per week, to take the kids for at least 2 to 3 hours at a time. If you can't afford it, do an exchange with a friend.

Go get a pedicure, a massage, take a long walk, meet up with a friend or work on a favorite project.

Also, at home you can have the kids focus on a game, a craft or even (dare I say it!) a half hour TV program while you send a few emails to friends, make yourself a herbal tea, or simply do some reading (housework verboten!).